It will be a long weekend. I will not see her for couple of days. Today, even she in front of me, my lips became speechless. Don’t know what to say. No word came from my mouth to ask her anything about us. I suppose not to went out from home but my heart said just go and see her. Talk to her. Go see her beautiful smile. Cause I know only me know that.
Both of us know our hearts belong to Allah. Our hearts guarded by Allah. Allah has destined us to meet again because there is a good reason. Allah has determine the best for us. Patient today for a happy tomorrow.
Sometimes we do not get what we deserve. Then we blame fate cause too disappointed. While we do not realized what we get is better than what we expected .
Sometimes, it’s just cut me deep. I know that she had right to do what ever she want, to be as we plan or not, what she do, what she want to eat or dress, who she met and who she hang out. She can do anything without telling me. Maybe I too caring for every detail she did. I'm just a person that Allah create with some feeling like to know something, happy, sad, jealous. I believe love base on trust and knowing each other. Maybe just over thinking. Actually I just love her. That all.
I know she is in a dilemma in choosing a path to happiness or suffering. I'm just an ordinary person. I’m not perfect. I just want that she accepted me with utmost sincerity. Cover my weakness with your strongest. Make me a better man tomorrow.
I know difficult for her to accept me after what happened to her. Her heart hurt, humiliation and pain. I do not want this to happened. I wish I could turn back time. I know she need time to think about us cause decision made for her entire life.
Sometimes thinking about pain that I feel every day nothing compare to what she face all this time. I don’t regret what happened to me, even I die because of this. But I will regret for the whole my life if it’s happened to my love, her.
I just hope she accepts me. Give me a chance to take care of her for the rest of my life. To be my spouse. To let me be her beloved husband. Give me a chance to make her happy.
I know when both of us not together, the distance will keep us apart. But distance, no matter how far, can’t change these feeling in my heart. Her eyes have seen so many places and that heart has felt so many taste and yet she still smile at the darkest feelings and find expression in everything that’s coloured beautiful.
I hope she always remember me for everyday when we not together. Just like I said to her before, “ If there ever come a day when we can’t be together, keep me in your heart I’ll stay there forever”.
Just don’t ever given up on us.
I will miss her for this long weekend…
Just MISS U…
Just LOVE U…
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